Sunbathers snoozing in the midday sun;
oil basted bodies turning golden brown.
Flip me over when I’m looking done,
I’ll be nicely tanned when the sun goes down.
Wriggle discreetly into the cossies,
one gust of wind and you expose the lot
Spray yourselves against the mossies
Put on the sunscreen, don’t miss a spot.
Dash to the ocean, we’re really busting,
the cooling water is just the thing.
Some of that flotsam looks disgusting.
And watch for jellyfish, they really sting.
Surfers bobbing around on their boards,
waiting patiently for the ideal wave.
Ignore the incoming deadly shark hordes,
fortune will always favour the brave.
Children screaming, running wild
with zinc cream war paint on their faces.
A game of cricket may look mild,
But it puts poor grandad through his paces.
Dad tries to get the barbie to light
with soggy driftwood and one of his fags.
But he knows he’s in a losing fight,
Cos the dog has run off with the snags.
“I’ve been stung” cries mum in indignation
Uncle Tom’s buried up to his head.
Tommy’s drowning, he’s lost flotation.
Grans looking pale, perhaps she’s dead.
The sky clouds over, a breeze is blowing,
rain comes down, it’s a belter.
Grab the kids, let’s all get going,
run like hell for the nearest shelter.
Fish and chips for tea that night
Find a pub to drown the sorrow,
a cleansing ale makes anything right.
We’ll head for home first thing tomorrow
Home next day with bright red sunburn,
salt water basted, seared in the sun.
Swollen and bruised, they’ll never learn.
It’s what all good Aussies do for fun.
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